future>_<

In the future...what is my ambition??I have think before,but I cant get the answer..
can anyone answer my question?I almost everytime will struggler my head and think,what I like?What I want to do??I always help to consoule other people,but when facing my own problem,I cant even think logically.Why other people got their dream,but why not me??
I hope to be as normal as them!!
Everytime,when the exam is around the corner,I really got work hard for it,but I wont get a good result!!What's wrong with me??I dont hope to blame anyboy because of that...
haiz..everytime when I saw my friend result are more better than me,I will flet very jeoulus,but I dont show it out..I just kept on smilling.I felt very unhappy...but nobody will know it.
In my family..my brother always like to irritated me..he like to quarrel with me.
but i cant feed back him,because my parents will scold me.>_<
I felt I am a nobody for them...
sometime,I wish I can blame the god.But I cant..because I knew that,this is very childish.
And unlogical....
But what can I do???
nobody wish my unhappiness with me...
nobody love me...
nobody is fair with me...